morethanjellytots Subscribe to RSS Feed
post 2 on Saturday 20th January 2007 at 13:49

Do You Beat Your Wife?

My deadlines at University are so close. I can't believe I have left it this late. If I fail this year I will now know how NOT to do it for ANOTHER year. So I'm trying so hard to work diligently.

But not too hard. I went to the football last week for the first time ever. I was so surprised by the serenity of the place. I was expecting bottle smashed faces and cattle crushes but no, only a poster; quite obviously nestled amongst its target audience, posing the question everybody wants to answer "do you beat your wife". Dear me. What a world of stereotypes. You have to laugh.

tags: [ advertising ] [ career ] [ culture ] [ university of teesside ]
post 24 on Wednesday 25th April 2007 at 10:20

Student Vis Awards

University of Teesside Student Vis AwardsHoo and ray! The Student Vis Awards site (as designed by Halcyonelle) actually went live two days ago, and I never posted a shameless self-promoting link amongst my various belles-lettres. What was I thinking?

tags: [ career ] [ university of teesside ] [ web site design ]
post 25 on Wednesday 25th April 2007 at 19:58

Letter Of Intent

Getting on, meI Helen C Davies, intend not to leave my only-three-weeks-to-go database systems assignment, with a hand-in date of 16th May 2006, a day longer, and I Helen C Davies, pledge to try my hardest not to be a student that would rather be at her paid job. I would also like to state that I am hereby registering my intent to allow myself freedom from black eye bags and waking up thinking about UML.

tags: [ career ] [ university of teesside ]
post 26 on Tuesday 8th May 2007 at 17:48

The House Life Doctor

Watch out, they sometimes hunt in packs!I saw my old boss today in ASDF. For the benefit of the uninformed I will allow myself the pleasure of bringing you up to speed on my last job before starting work with National.

I worked in telesales for a local building and glazing firm qualifying sales leads for shoddy salesmen who would visit the customer’s home with a view to supplying extraneous Double Glazing Units. I must mention now that I felt a definite sense of divided loyalties in this job: should I fulfil the criteria of a good telesales person, closing leads through furnishing misinformation, or do I commit to a strange sense of obligation to mankind (not to mention the old ladies) by not allowing the wool to be pulled over their eyes; and let the salesmen do their worst once they were on the property?

Anyhoo, I was working through a database of about 6000 customer contacts whilst simultaneously trying to ignore the dwindling number of available customers that I could actually call to qualify. Then one day, not so far from me reaching the end of the records on file, and with the promise of street selling looming, the boss called me on the ‘phone an hour before I was due to work. He said "We're very sorry Helen (and the intonation of his voice was really grating my tits at this point) but we're going to have to let you go [like I was foaming at the mouth to lose my £7 an hour job!]". This was backed up by a short and to-the-point letter the very next morning (so they'd been planning it?) and thus I was cast onto the cold, hard streets of unemployment (although my student status rendered me one above totally redundant!) And lo! Hot on heels of the jobs hub of the North East, the University of Teesside Students' Union web site, trawling endless bar jobs to find something remotely suitable, I came across a job for a web developer at up to £8 an hour.

Look how I witter? Back to Gary! ... I stood in the queue contemplating the lentils or the red kidney beans and I never noticed he was in front of me. My feeling is that he, for his sins, had tried to remain inconspicuous in order to avoid my attention, cowering behind his copy of The Sun like a shameful schoolboy. Clearly, he believed himself to have committed some wrongdoing in my eyes? For when we finally made eye contact after all these months, and his vacant fish-like stare met with my wide-eyed surprise and luscious enjoyment at seeing him squirm, he couldn't possibly have known that losing my job with The House Doctor was the best thing that happened to me. In fact it's safe to say it brought about some things in my life that go beyond my comprehension of the happiness possible from "a job".

So thank you, Gary. For everything. For bringing me a routine, a chance to make mistakes and learn from it, extra money, friends, happiness and love!

tags: [ career ] [ rants ]