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post 6 on Friday 23rd February 2007 at 19:04

The False Promises of Magazines

I wrote this a few years ago but bought a magazine yesterday breaking a magazine-fast of a few months. It kinda sparked something off. ;P

Why it is that any self-respecting, intelligent woman would get sucked into the false promises of women’s magazines?

If you walk along any news stand, you'll notice delightfully achievable captions such as "CHANGE YOUR LIFE IN YOUR LUNCH BREAK - WE DID IT YOU CAN TOO!". Society places too many demands on us as humans, and some of us assume that something must be wrong with our lives if we're not fulfilling the roles that society has created for us. Magazines enforce this by creating a problem which we must now solve though reading the damned magazine. In fact, the problem never existed, and because it never existed, it can never be solved. Thus when we inevitably "fail" to reach this unreachable solution, we feel inadequate.

And yet magazines are full of outrageously contradicting advice. On one page we are told to look thin, be saintly, and preserve our figures because we’re special, and we should stay that way. Yet the next page opposes the previous with recipes for "naughty" and “sinful” foods we should make to "indulge" ourselves and our families. They made chocolate sinful! Them and the diet brigade, but that's another story.

What I have had to remember is that magazines are fed this shite directly from people trying to make a fast buck out of playing on our desires and fantasies - advertisers. These people are educated on what buttons to press. Not only do they have demographics; for example age, gender and location, they also think they know us by simply sliding us neatly into one of their social grade categories (waves to all the C1s out there!!). In short, they know what subconscious desires and needs they can tap in to based on who we are and where were going, or want to go.

The saddest thing is that this is just a reflection of our current society. We are told what to wear, what to eat, what to think, and what to need, and not by some body that we have elected to listen to - but by people trying to make money, for themselves.

If you want to be sane and happy, boycott women’s magazines.

tags: [ feminist rants ] [ rants ]
post 19 on Tuesday 17th April 2007 at 15:23

I'm Not A Feminist Or Anything But...

My bra is smouldering in the hearth as I typeIt might never end until we stop using our bodies as a measure of our self-worth. We all do it. The trouble comes in that we're traders now, not nomads. Everyone who is here to make money will try to do so in the most successful way. This might even involve using our fears to sell us stuff - one of those fears happens to be grounded in a woman's need to be part of her society (one where you can find your place, somehow, be you off-the-wall or conventional - but *a* place) so when fashion dictates we should be a certain size and shape of course we want to be part of that. But before we had fashion, did we care about the size of our bums? It wasn't until male designers came about designing stuff (oh apart from the religious thing, but that's another story) that we had any problems. Let me add they probably preferred an androgynous male form, and thus the girlies started squeezing their bodies into non-ergonomic clothing and starving down to un-natural proportions. The trends sometimes for hourglass, waif, athletic, size-0, etc, would be totally irrational to a nomadic person. Damn, you'd need a good pair of feet, strong legs, and a healthy body and mind to be this woman. You'd have to forage and hunt to live and your body would both support and cultivate this. So now what? We have a lazy body pushed into various insane and downright dangerous diets, exercises, medical practices and, the horror, surgery; undertaken in the name of a desirable, fashion-worthy body which also happens to be socially and culturally unobtainable – after all, we don't get honed pecs and abs talking on the phone and typing all day do we? And it's easy to be overweight via food, as it's so cheap.

You know I have been shocked by the women I've seen trawling around three major cities over the last month in the UK (the worst of which was undoubtedly London) who look absolutely miserable. This woman's complexion is grey, dehydrated, pinched; her expression wears a dull veil and her eyes bear a spike of panic. She certainly wouldn't come home with a freshly-killed boar slung over a well-muscled shoulder. Why? Because she's starved down to nothing to become a fashion designers dream; and I'm bloody sick of seeing people looking unhappy, unhealthy, and thin.

Yep, it sucks, OK.

tags: [ feminist rants ]
post 30 on Thursday 17th May 2007 at 09:50

Rise Of The Mumnet

Sisters are logging on for themselvesI have just read on the BBC that young women now outnumber their male counterparts online. They’ll be spending an estimated $22.1bn on the interweb in 2007 - no doubt on utter tat (for evidence of this please see below). Women also now account for 38% of online gamers.

But this doesn’t reflect a seismic shift in women becoming more capable or tech-savvy, nor even does it have anything to do with women, men or gender. It’s to do with the web becoming more accessible, more advertised, more promoted; and is part of rise of the culture of the web. Every body with a face has a web site and women are still only into babies and handbags. I bet the games women play online help them grow, suckle and rear cyber babies.

But the difference between women and men, in real life and online, is that women are more comfortable with social networking. We gossip over coffee. We idle away hours wondering what everyone else is up to. And now we add unknowns to our "friend list" with the hope of idle chit-chat. And with the rise of Web 2.0 applications, such as Facebook, this is easily done online. Meanwhile, the men are frantically searching for women with which to engage themselves in cyber sex.

I’m starting to realise the web world is not much different to the real world. And while it used to be the domain of the technically adept, it’s fast becoming a corporate breeding ground in which greedy ethics naturally entice a full societal spectrum. And so now the masses have been admitted. The women want babies, the men want sex. As above, so below. Everybody's happy.

Top Sites For Women Age 18-34 (BBC)

tags: [ culture ] [ domestics ] [ feminist rants ] [ online ]
post 32 on Saturday 19th May 2007 at 20:42

Fw: Never Argue With A Woman...

Statue of a woman readingOne morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.

Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"

"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, "Isn't that obvious?")
"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her.
"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading."
"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."
"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.
"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.
"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."
"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.

tags: [ feminist rants ] [ jokes ]
post 42 on Tuesday 14th August 2007 at 19:09

Rapex – Are You Old Enough To Bleed?

A new anti-rape device dubbed "vengeful" and "disgusting" will be released onto shelves in South Africa in the coming month.

The device looks a lot like the female condom Femidom – differing only in its inclusion of sharp teeth, worn internally with the intention to lacerate and maim anything that may enter its razor-lined jaws.

Whilst I agree with Rapex (I feel bad even typing that word) in principle – the reality of such a device reeks of brutal DIY barbarism. It reminds me of Tony Martin of Bleak House fame shooting down that sixteen year old Fred Barras lad on the pretext "if you're where you shouldn't be, expect what you don't want". Deciphering just how a rapist is supposed to tell whether or not his victim may or may not be wearing the "Rapex" device is unfathomable.

But you'd expect the lady to walk carefully whilst harbouring a small barber’s kit in her lettuce leaves.

But, he shouldn’t be there in the first place, should he? What happens if it’s a young lad of sixteen, goes by the name of "Frid", say, who knows know better?

Ah I give up. Ladies and gents, I present to you: Rapex – now men can be old enough to bleed, old enough to butcher, too.

tags: [ feminist rants ] [ products ] [ rants ]